Expectations

The moment I type this word in MS word... I look for its synonyms… and the most familiar word I find is ‘Hope’… I always have unconvinced explanation for this word… I always hear people saying… “Never keep expectations, they hurt” … and unfortunately, sometimes it comes out true… logically!

Take this case… One lucky day you meet someone… and as every good relationship starts with a good and healthy friendship, so it does… luckily, you start meeting her everyday… and very slowly you find that you actually love to be with her... in her presence you forget all of your pains… whose chattering soothe you… whose smile makes your day and you find it world’s the most beautiful!!… you sleep at night in hope to meet her in morning… you lend your ears on her every small – small sayings… you love looking into her eyes… you find all of your answers there… you do not hesitate in making the most stupidest and obvious excuse just to listen her voice even if it is just… hmm/yes/ok!!... you feel her pain… you try your best to solve all of her problems… you find your happiness in her happiness… you know her likes/dislikes… you try doing everything which makes her happy and comfortable… you notice every little thing of her… in fact you start taking care of everything which is directly/indirectly related to her... you never knew but you actually feel great in doing that!

When you are busy in service… there is one more thing growing parallel to this… unnoticed… unintended… and that is Hope… hope of being treated in the same manner you treat her… if not all, at least for few!!... and when you don’t find it to be happen, you start feeling blue… whenever you look into her eyes you feel unanswered… you find yourself in such a conversation in which all you listen is just your echo…

I don’t find it wrong in keeping a little hope that can give you immense happiness or satisfaction… after all whole world is relying on hope!! If you have got hope for something you start act accordingly… I mean, if you are looking for something you will make all possible effort to get that… so keeping hope can make you act in a direction which will take you to your desired destination… the most important part in this, is to have clear idea for what you are keeping hope… you have put your heart in and she doesn’t even get a taste of it!! So always keep expectation, but from the right person… ironically, in most of the cases expectations are right but they fail because they are expected from a wrong person… sometimes everything is right but situations or circumstances aren’t fair enough… huh… and when expectations aren’t met, you broke down.

Are expectations one’s assumptions? Yes that’s absolutely right… assumptions are always made where there is a chance it to be true… if you are in any kind of relationship (Family, friend or love) and assuming everything is perfect, then somewhere you are expecting similar from your companion… because it can’t be perfect and stay for long if only one part is involved… the other half also have to contribute somewhat similar to make it absolutely perfect… good and long lasting relationships are made only when both contribute equally… and to check whether it is balanced… requires testing… a little testing is necessary to be assured of a good relationship… but it should be really little… testing brings expectation and vice-versa… expect only when it is really needed… when you really feel that something is missing… expecting a lot and expecting unnecessary can really make the statement “Never keep expectations, they hurt” true!!

Remember, Expectation always comes from the one who loves you… who really cares about you… the one who really needs you… your doodhwala... or your dhobi can’t expect anything from you except their payment!!

That’s it for now! You would say why ending it so abruptly… see, you are now expecting more from me  … no, it is just because things in my life which I like are ending up abruptly, without even notifying me… and unfortunately I like writing too!!

At last, a nice phrase from Leo Buscaglia, a prominent author, “Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”

Untitled !

It was blurred, it was all bleary,
Full of darkness, it was shadowy,
Could have wiped it, but took it all casually,
I never thought of sailing before,
I wish it was all easy and rest for sure.

                           It was lashing heavily, but took it all gladly,
                           Couldn’t feel that breeze, while it was so windy,
                           I made a wish, perhaps it wasn’t from the core,
                           I wish it was all easy and rest for sure.

It was into a big swirl, it was all broken badly
Tried my best, but now it wasn’t so lively,
I crossed all over but it happened on the shore,
I wish it was all easy and rest for sure.

I wish It was all that easy...

I find it very difficult… really very difficult … the transformation of feelings into the words… and bring those words to the tongue… poor words have to travel all the way from crimson red cage(heart) to the trebuchet(tongue)… a steep climbing (down to up)… and that too carrying the load of feelings, emotions, desires, sentiments, hopes, fear and other hell lot of ‘U’ things… on the bet of dignity, honor, pride, self respect and other hell lot of ‘I’ things with it… try its the best… defying the law of gravity… but it fails… it will fail again and again… until it gets a tiny push from the person for which it is trying to come up… push can be in any form … but it should have some expression…  expression which leads words to just slip out of tongue… without putting any effort into it… expression could be either encouraging or discouraging(obviously, likely to be avoided!)… but it will take words to their launch pad!!… that’s for sure…

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;


Then took the other, as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

                                                       By- Robert Frost

Confusion over Conclusion

It was Friday and I was returning to home from office in my office bus... It was a windy, cloudy and stormy evening… but it was picturesque, especially the horizon; it had being painted in golden orange color ... And I really loved it! then suddenly it started raining... Rather it was pouring so heavily as if cloud burst… Rain drops were end up thrashing so hard on the window pane… as if they wanted to break it;  and I wish it could had happened because I wanted rain to come down around my face… btw it didn’t happen… however the pane was shivering out of fear with making some annoying sound! And I really felt pity on pane! After countless strikes… the rain finally stopped. I again saw at window pane… now it was much quiet than before... and the rain which were striking it few minutes back now scattered in making millions of drops on it.. Whenever a headlight flashes on the pane, the closely stick drops were glittering like side of a dupatta worn by woman which is flooded with countless stars … it looked so pretty that I wanted to capture it… but couldn’t! While I was busy in watching this beautiful scene... something deviated me... and the cause was this tiny little drop which was sliding down slowly on the window pane from top of it to the down... and few centimeter below of it I could see one more little drop which was stick so tightly to the pane as if it is waiting for the earlier one and doesn’t want to slide down… suddenly the first drop which was sliding down struck the other one waiting down… and because of this course of action two things happened at a same time.. Two drops merged with each other and created a new big drop… this is what makes me confused… I am not able to conclude this event because I am not sure what happened exactly, I should end up it saying whether both the drops lost their selves or a new drop got life… which one should be given more highlight? To those who have given their sacrifices or to the one who receives a new life? Someone’s pain is another’s gain? Hope some day I’ll get answer to this but for now what I understood is… “Destruction of one’s identity is somewhere related to the construction of an entity”... this is what a life is all about….  

Googol.. making fun of India’s Bhoogol( Geography)!!

I had written one post about Chinese intrusion in India, you can find it in my previous post list. This post is just continuation of that post and is not on China vs India, but on Google, the company that is having a row with the Chinese over censorship and allegations that the dragon nation used gmail to hack into important networks outside China. And no, I am not defending Google in its fight against the Chinese censorship. As long as it is not my nation, I am not bothered by how another nation handles its censorship issues. 

Ohh… I am going off-track!! Let me bring my focus back on Google. China, with the largest internet users' base, is an important market for any Internet company. Google is no exception. And in its business interests, the company does all that is necessary to be good to the country it operates in. Hence, Google, bluntly put, makes a fool of both Indians and Chinese… And how is being done? Just take a look at the maps shown below and watch carefully the red color circled area… compare all three maps… and I am quite sure you won’t need any explanation!  

If you open the Google maps' China edition available at http://ditu.google.com, Arunachal would show itself as an undisputed part of China, the whole of Arunachal Pradesh on Google maps.

The point ‘A’ shown here inside the circle is ‘Arunachal Pradesh’!!… and it is clearly visible that it is in Chinese territory!! 
For the uninitiated, Arunachal is a disputed territory between the two nations, with both laying claim to its territory, notwithstanding India's greater claim to it given the fact that it has a democratically elected government in place for years now.
And if you open Google India on http://maps.google.co.in, is politically correct and our fellow citizens from Arunachal Pradesh can, thankfully, still call themselves Indians.

The real fun begins when it comes to opening the map available on the international edition at http://maps.google.com.

You can see the dotted lines above Arunachal Pradesh… The dotted lines are symbol of showing disputed areas... Huh!! Jai ho Google Devtaa ki!!... Everybody is happy now!!
 I think we have a right to demand that Google, since it operates from India and has considerable business interests here, make changes and not try to pretend to keep everyone happy when in reality is making a fool of everyone.
It doesn’t end up here… the same story is with Indo-Pak border… and guess what… narrated  again by our very own Google!!!!

Resemblance with Happiness...

While I truly believe that fighting for someone that you love is noble, sometimes you end up wondering why you even tried fighting so hard... Things seem to get lost in all of the pride that you swallow and there is no happiness left in what you do. As for now, I am ready to take that new road and do what I want for me...
I admit that I have not been the perfect lover... but mostly because I couldn't even be me anymore... I was unable to express what I had become, and that caused me to make plenty of mistakes... I wish I could say that I regret everything that I ever did since, but I have started to feel that what happened has made it more clear as to why things didn't work... All in all, I need to stop being scared of being alone and settling for something that isn't good enough... I am in no way saying that you aren't a good person, you just aren't for me... I think the worst mistake I made was giving a second chance.

Word of the wise: do what makes you happy.
......... Some random feeling, thought of sharing :) ...........

Are you really Connected?

wow! one more social networking website.. chance to make more online friends!.. this is what most of us think, whenever we hear about a new launch.. we all enjoy adding friends.. we all enjoy uploading pics.. we all enjoy playing FarmVille, mafiawars and all.. these so called social networking sites make our life real cool and happening.. 3 cheers for them!!.. huh!.. sharing your flat with 3 other friends.. knock-knock!!.. somebody is at door.. he is your roommate's friend.. roommate introduces him to you.. you say hi.. and you continue staring at your monitor instead of talking to him.. you are busy in adding new "eFriends" in your friends list.. something is happening new in your life but you are unaware.. or say intentionally avoiding it to be happen.. because you are busy in your virtual world.. all isn't well in your life these days.. you are searching for job.. the guy just walked in your room, working in a reputed software company.. he could have recommended your name for a vacancy in his current project.. it only could have happened if you had started a conversation with him.. but you were busy in harvesting your crop in FarmVille.. or updating your status message in Orkut!.. huh!!

I don’t say that Social Networking sites are bad but one has to use it keeping the difference in mind between the "Real connectivity" and "Virtual connectivity"... and to whom should be given the priority!

Android Platform

Recently, when I was reading an article about "Adam"- a tablet built by Notion Ink(a Hyderabad based company), started by a group of dedicated Indians from IIT Delhi and Kharagpur, came to know about Android Platform.

"Adam" is proving itself a worthy competitor of "Apple's iPad". Adam is ready to be launch in US and Notion Ink will make it available in June/July and will charge between range of $327-$800 (Rs. 15,700-Rs. 38,400 approx.) depending on the configuration. While iPad's starting price is $499 (Rs. 24,000 approx.).

The Adam tablet runs dual-core ARM Cortex A9 CPUs bearing Nvidia Tegra 2 System-on-a-Chip while Apple iPad uses company's own A4 SoC silicon. Both SoC chips have capability of running at 1GHz clock speed.

Well that is all about Adam and Apple! Now i'll talk about only "Android" the platform on which these two players are playing their games!

The Android platform is the product of the "Open Handset Alliance", a group of organizations collaborating to build a better mobile phone. The group, led by Google, includes mobile operators, device handset manufacturers, component manufacturers, software solution and platform providers, and marketing companies. From a software development standpoint, Android sits smack in the middle of the open source world.

There are very few Android developers in India. Android environment is built upon Linux Kernel. Its UI subsystem includes,

• Windows
• Views
• Widgets

Android provides all connectivity options including WiFi, Bluetooth, and wireless data over a cellular connection (for example, GPRS, EDGE, and 3G). A popular technique in Android applications is to link to Google Maps to display an address directly within an application. Support for location-based services (such as GPS) and accelerometers is also available in the Android software stack, though not all Android devices are equipped with the required hardware. There is also camera support.

Android promises to be a market-moving open source platform that will be useful well beyond cell phones.

For more http://www.android.com/index.html

Save Indian Wildlife..

India is growing day by day in the name of Economy but on the other hand loosing its Natural resources, Wildlife and Environment. This is due to lack of awareness in people here or rather I should say the carelessness of Indian Government towards the importance of wildlife and healthy environment. Natural habitats for the wild animals are shrinking or being demolished, no place left here for wild animals and the existing ones are fighting for their existence. Sanctuaries and National Reserved Parks are under the threat of poachers and land mafias. Those who are really working to protect the tiger and other wild lives are being threatened by the poachers and even by some government officials and politicians. Few NGO and private wildlife welfare societies run campaigns to save the Indian National Animal Tiger, but are not successful to create that much impact because people here do not bother at all and if they do then this situation would not have occurred. We all always talk about numbers and figures, no one here wants to come out and shout in the name of protection of wildlife and environment or better I should say to protect our own life. If we can remember A-Z and know its importance then why do we cant remember Life Chain chapter and its importance in our life, which we all must have read during our primary education. Every living thing present in the world today is connected with each other and creating a chain of life, if any link is broken the whole chain will get disturbed. So we should protect each and every link in order to maintain the cycle or chain of life.

Please spread awareness among the people and help in protecting Indian wildlife. It is time to take action.. so stop talking and start doing....
.. just a click.. http://www.saveourtigers.com/ .. and you might save a graceful, fearless creature.. or else b ready to hear its last ROAR!!

Tabla.. an amazing musical instrument!

I have been listening to the beats of this amazing, tremendous and magical musical instrument since my childhood... just listened to it.. never tried my hands on.. that is because of my father.. he plays so well ki i just love listening to it.. i always feared of playing tabla in his presence, i couldn't ever dare to do so.. so whenever he wasn't there.. i did some dham-dham!! dhad-dhad!!.. i don't know what stopped me learning tabla from him.. perhaps the fear of failure!.. well that's a different thing.. let's talk about tabla.. ya i just love the sound of "Thaap"(the beat).. there are lots of "Taals" in tabla.. like "do taal", "teen taal"... love specially "tirkit", "na-dhin-dhin-na".. amazing stuff!

you can get some more info about tabla and its taal from here...
http://chandrakantha.com/tablasite/bsicbols.htm


whenever someone talks about tabla, a very familiar face comes into our mind.. very curly, dense black hair.. shaking his head.. as if he is born to beat the leather!..waah ustaad waah!!.. yes I am talking Ustad Zaakir Hussain... son of great tabla player ustad allarakha khan.. watch this.. father-son duo, playing together..

Recently i came to know about one more tabla player.. while searching for tabla video on youtube.. i saw this man playing tabla.. i felt amazed!! then i googled to know more about him.. and i found that he is a British Indian.. he worked with A R Rehman.. and played tabla for great musicians.. he is Talvin Singh.. he played tabla for the famous "Buddha Bar" album..

and my favorite one is.. i just love this beat..

here he played the spirit of mumbai..

and here it goes the very famous "Bombay Theme", he played with A. R. Rehman..

Spot! the Not..

some times it happens to me.. it is quite personal.. but i think that i should share it.. k.. so it all starts with 'Shunya'[lang: Sanskrit] 'the Zero'.. my mind goes all blank.. absolute absence of thought.. and i start gaining some pleasure!.. but i get irritated as well.. because i am not able to find the source of pleasure.. so i start searching for same.. In the process i see some dark, blurred, hazy kinda spot!.. i start concentrating on the center to see what is it exactly... suddenly a ring around it, starts building up.. and as i try to concentrate more on the center, the ring shines more and more.. it gives me immense pleasure.. but again i feel unanswered.. this is bizarre!.. it is all happening with my eyes closed... suddenly i start visualizing my recent activities and reviewing my conversations with people, whom i met recently... i see a lot of people around me.. doing all crap they could! like chattering, poking me!.. i see myself as a sick.. suffering from an unknown disease... some faces around me try to console me..preach me.. they look a bit familiar to me.. but i am not looking at them at all... i am seeing something else.. yes.. @ the spot!! the same bit dark, hazy spot!! mentioned few lines above.. due to my ignorance.. people start leaving me behind.. my concentration gets disturbed as i heard some murmuring about the Spot! from someone... he says to someone, there is no existence of such spot!... how dare he?.. i said to myself.. i have seen it so many times.. even i felt it inside me.. who the hell is he to say so?.. somebody beside me, said.. he is the one who made a research on the spot! for more than 2 years.. he had a team of scholars and he even organized a worldwide survey to find out the existence of the spot!.. so did he find anything?.. what was the result of that worldwide survey? i asked.. nothing! he and his team of scholars didn't find any spot! so they have declared there is no such spot! exists.. he said.. what the hell are you talking.. cut the crap! you fool.. after 2 years of a crap research.. and a shitty survey.. he concluded that there is no such spot!.. let me tell you.. i am 25 now, and i see as well as feel that spot! inside me from the past 10 years.. no one can say rubbish to this.. and those who raise question about the existence of the spot!.. are senseless dysfunctional!!.. one can't define pleasure based on some shitty report.. "the pleasure is true while the origin is always a mystery!!".. i guess, i have said it all.. but still if it is not enough.. take a look at here..
PS: This post is just an individual's opinion and the scenario is no where related to its author.. :)